Stevie B’s Story

You are probably sitting there wondering who am I and how did I help figure out these ideas on this site? Well here’s my story…

Where the Problems in My Life Began

The truth of how all of this came to be started was with one thing. Women. I loved them and thought they were the most beautiful things on this planet. My problem though was that I was horrible with women. All through high school and university I had little to no success with any woman.

So why was I so bad with women? At the time, I thought the problem was that people weren’t doing what they were suppose to do because I was told that if I did x then I would get the girl. So you can imagine that I did the exact same thing with every girl I saw and I got the exact same result every time.

Nothing.

I believe the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result each time, so I think I fit that definition to the tee. Although insanity was probably a pretty good definition of how I looked from an outsider, the feelings inside me where nothing but depression and anxiety. I was never enough for anyone and ever girl who I liked always went with another guy.

It wasn’t until I decided to ask why is that other guy getting the girl that I want? Why can they say hi to strangers and I can’t? Why can other guys say things that I think are taboo and yet women find those guys more attractive? Why? Why? Why?

And then it hit me.

The Answer Lied Within

They don’t believe the same things I do. They can say hi to strangers because that voice in their head was not telling them that it was rude or impolite. That voice in their head never stopped them to say those things that I would think is wrong. It was what I was saying to myself that was stopping me from becoming who I wanted to be and I figured out that the only way out of this was to learn how to think properly.

And so my journey began. I began to watch guys and listen to them so I can see what they are saying and examine what they are doing. I read books on the subject of meeting people. I then tried to listen to my thoughts to hear what they say when I went to Toastmasters or when I spoke to random people.

I tried to build myself up as much as I could and things slowly started to change. I expanded my knowledge on the subject by talking with a group of guys who chatted about women and how to win their hearts. What I learned were all interesting concepts that I applied and found that sometimes those concepts worked and sometimes they did not work.

The One Thing Everyone Needs To Do

In hindsight, I realized that what I needed in my life was a different perspective. I needed someone to say “No. What you are thinking about is wrong. You have to do this.” And yet at the same time I also needed to ask if what they said was right. It was this battle of what I thought was right vs. what they thought was right that got me thinking that everything that I was told may be wrong.

And so I began to question who I am and why do I feel bad. How do I get my results and why do things happen the way they do. It was this constant internal battle with myself that lead me down the path of what life is really about. Without someone first giving me a different perspective on why my beliefs were wrong, I would have never learned the one skill we all need.

Choice.

By letting myself choose a path that might have been wrong, I am now able to say that this new path that I am on is actually right, until I am proven wrong. I found that it was my choice to not choose what I thought was right that stopped me from getting what I wanted. The more I listened to people and did what they wanted, the more I went further away from what I wanted.

And so I am where I am today.

I now realized that I’ve taken some bumpy paths because without doing so I would have never learned what it is like to go down the smooth path. I’ve gone from depressed and wanting to kill myself to being Captain Amazing who can do nothing but smile every day.

What I Have Learned

And yet I know that I don’t know everything there is to know about life. Just when I think I have the answer, I get another question that changes it. And so I’ve come to learn this:

- That anyone who tells me they know they answer to life, I know they don’t know that answer, as there isn’t one.

- It is more important to choose a position, go with it and then change it when it is proven wrong. Positions are way more valuable then having right answers. I’d much rather get what I want, then be right.

- I know that every path is different and although we may have similar interests, we will never be the same. Therefore, I can never know the answer to solve your question. Only you can do so.

- That being successful with money, women (or men), friends and just about anything is simply a product of who you are inside. Figuring out how you can be the best person inside will give you untold riches because results are a by-product of you. Results are never the goal.

This is my path and how I have come to learn how to play this game called life. I will never say that this is the way to go to understand life. In fact, I ask you not to take the same path. Because the right position lies when everyone can agree with it when they have been down completely different paths then I have.

So live your life and make your choices. It is the most amazing thing you’ll ever do…